Rainy Day and Self Doubt
I was so excited when I started, but a few days later I doubted myself and I asked “Who am I anyway?”
These days exist. Unfortunately. But did you know, that those thoughts are solely to protect yourself? It’s your brain telling you that there is no evidence of success in the past. It’s better to stop now instead of failing.
Imagine a situation you did a thousand times. Have you ever doubted yourself? Probably not because then you wouldn’t have done it several times.
I take self doubt as a sign
When I start doubting myself, it just means I haven’t done this yet. It means I’m stepping out of my comfort zone. But that is a good thing. Because I grow my circle of experience.
I can not allow that my rational brain takes over all the time. Because sometimes, life needs to be irrational to be expanded. And soon enough I can build this future past for my brain to feel safe.
How Does It Show Up?
Self doubt doesn’t announce itself.
“Hey, here I am!”
It’s not like that. It’s more in the actions you may or may not take. It’s more like creating patterns over time. Especially if you’re unaware it can spiral down real fast and holding you back in life.
I have four very intense signs of self doubt.
- Overthinking
I overthink decisions I’ve made and replay them in my head over and over again. What could I have said or done differently? - Fear of judgment
This one is very real for me and probably my most common sign. I would give up an idea just because someone could judge me. - Procrastination
It takes forever for me to get started. I constantly don’t feel ready or good enough. - Comparing myself with others
This is especially difficult with social media. It needs a really strong mindset to not compare my first chapter to someone else’s fifty’s chapter.
Self Doubt Is Real
But with the right angle and the right support it can be a stepping stone to awesomeness. I’m not a professional, but I doubt myself quiet a lot. I now speak from experience and ways, I could handle my negative thoughts.
There is no quick fix. But with consistency and a lot of reflection I could see little wins over the time. It built confidence in myself over time. Here are my routines to fight self doubt:
- Recognizing the patterns I’ve mentioned above. This is the first step of conquering this mental state. Because only if I’m aware that something is going on, I can face and fix it.
- Reflecting on what can go right. This way I start to create a possible experience to this situation. If I do this long enough, my brain can’t distinguish if it’s a memory or just a thought.
- Imagine myself successfully in this situation. It’s the same concept. It’s similar to manifestation. Eventually my brain has this much needed past experience.
- I reflect on other success stories in my life. Comparing myself only with myself. I even recognize small and unrelated wins. They’re proof of my ability to succeed.
For me these patterns show up most likely when there is less sunlight. Like on rainy and cloudy days. Living in North Germany, where the weather is mostly like that, made it really hard to stay confident.
I now live in Spain and my mood is mainly positive and bright. I still have self doubts, but not as much. I don’t know if this is scientifically related, but it is a observation I made.
I'm Vulnerable
And that’s ok. If you can relate and find yourself in these words, it’s worth it. If my story helps you to build confidence, it’s worth it. Self doubt is a difficult place to be. But it’s not impossible to master it. It will never disappear forever, but you can create awareness around it.
How do you master self doubt? What’s your anti dote?
